More random musings, from a tired mind. This, from December 19, 2010.

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I mentioned it before; there are these ebbs and flows to life. An elliptical orbit around a center point of consistency.

If not consistency, at least a normal, unshakable, virtually unchangeable… something.

Sometimes the orbit takes you further from that center, but eventually, and sometimes too quickly, the ellipse is complete and you’re right back to where you started. Almost like a gravitational sling-shot – the harder you pull to escape that tug, the faster it snaps you right back into the orbit of patterns. Patterns of similar troubles, similar situations, similar feelings – and all too often, we try and solve them, to break the orbit, using the same solutions that never worked to begin with.

The problem becomes, as simple animals, we forget. Time erases or at least blurs the memory of the emotional scars. Or, we do a great job in getting past them and move on from those scars only to find we’re opening them back up without even knowing it.

Self-reflection is a good thing but it can only take you so far.

We attempt to make changes; to grab a new path, to find a new center, yet somehow we come right back to where we once were. Sometimes we try new solutions only to discover they were really the same old solutions, we just didn’t realize it.

How do we escape it?

What is the solution?

How do we grow as people, change for the better, become who we want and find happiness?

I wish I knew.

..how things change.

With a change in perspective comes so many other changes. What we will dedicate our time to, the things we want, the things we enjoy, our goals, our appreciations. Even who we relate to and how we relate to others.

Like the wind from a butterfly's wings and all that other string theory crap.

Sometimes I just have to sit back in amazement just to observe... then move on with life and wonder if that orbit was indeed broken, or if it will simply come back full circle again.