There’s no such thing as an undamaged person, but to understand someone else’s damage, to understand what they need, and to understand who you need to be in order to not add to that damage takes effort. A lot of effort. Effort that very few people are willing to put into a relationship.

This is really complicated. But it isn’t about who is damaging who, or what damage we all have. We have to start putting more effort into understanding ourselves, having patience with each other, and recognizing the things that truly matter in our world. There’s no one right answer, or easy answer, or magic pill.